I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
