This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize