So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
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