So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
You can't motorboat a personality
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Randomize
