Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
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