I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Randomize
