No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Randomize
