So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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