I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Randomize
