At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
