At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
