this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Randomize
