party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I am available for nakedness
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Randomize