Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
