i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
