If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
