"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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