It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I am one with the molecules
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
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