so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
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