She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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