You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize
