cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
3 2 1 whiskey
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
