..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
The cops high fived after they tackled you
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
Randomize
