Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
