did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Randomize
