Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
