I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
Who did Billy Mays play for?
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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