you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
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