You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
