Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Randomize
