The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
Randomize