Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Randomize
