Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
I supernannyed him into submission
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize