you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Randomize
