no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
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