Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
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