shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
Randomize
