he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize