That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
