I just made out with a guy for $7.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
I cut my penus on the lid.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Randomize