I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize
