She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
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