No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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