How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize