did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
