Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
