Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
