How'd it feel making her break her religion?
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Randomize
