There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
