she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
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